Doctor Who and the World Cup!
by Doctor who romance
Summary: The Doctor and Amy on an airplane after the Doctor crashes the Tardis when he's hammered, Amy fixes the music settings to a lot of Waka Waka by shakira, Doctor gets W.C bow tie, Amy chats up footie player, Doctor scores winning goal for England!
1. Chapter 1

Author's note: Hi my readers! I was inspired to write this from combination of sheer irritation that my dad continues to watch the World Cup ever night. Then I listened to Shakira's Waka Waka (This time for Africa) And thought that it would be hilarious to do a world cup fanfic! Lucky Amy. She gets a mac, I get a battered old PC! Remember, reviewers get cookies and a hug from Amy!

The Doctor was bounding energetically round the console. Amy was typing frantically

"I have a treat for you, Amelia Pond!" She folded the Mac up and put if away

"Go on then, tell me!"

"No! It's a surprise, I'm not going to tell you until we're there."

Amy pouted

" Please?"

"No"

"Pretty please!" 

"Pretty Please? No!"

"PRETTY PLEASE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!"

"NO! "

"Pretty please with a cheery cherry on top and a silver tray"

"No. No .No!"

"PRETTY PLEASE WITH A CHERRY AND A SILVER TRAY AND A EXTREMELY LARGE COOKIE FOR ANYONE REVIEWS MY STORIES ON FANFICTION!"

"WHAT?"

"um. Fanfiction" *Blushes deeply

"What is it?" The Doctor looks entrigued

"I'm not telling you"

"Please?"

"No.

""Pretty please!" 

"Nope!"

"PRETTY PLEASE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!"

"NO! " But Amy had just thought of an idea.

"You tell me where we're going and I'll tell you what fanfiction is."

"Oh alright! WE'RE GOING TO THE WORLD CUP!"


	2. Chapter 2

Amy had only been able to sleep half the night, she was so excited. She wasn't really a footie girl, but it would be fun to go and the buzz of excitement was very infectious. The Doctor was really into it, and he was kicking a football round the TARDIS with loud crashes as books and debris rained down, and he was shouting as all the members of the male gender do, when playing football:

"WHAT A SHOT!"

"GOAL!"

"AND THE DOCTOR WORKS HIS WAY ROUND THE SWIMMING POOL, THROUGH THE GIANT RUBBER DUCK, AND WHAT A GO-"

The last was accompanied by a sound of a football rebounding, the slip of feet on wet tiles and a loud splash.

Amy ran into the room to see a lot of bubbles on the surface. She was just about to jump in when a wet head with drenched hair plastered to it rose above the water. Amy was confronted with a large grin.

"Hello Pond."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm a bit wet though"

"I can see that! So, when are we going to the World Cup?"

"As soon as I get dry and after we eat lunch! Mmm, fish finger and custard sandwiches, lovely!"

Amy rolled her eyes

"I _really_ hope those _things_ are not to be served for lunch; otherwise they mind find their way to a new home."

The Doctor looked at her quizzically

"The swimming pool. And you'll have to clean it out."

"Oh. I like them though!"

"Well you eat them then, and don't come whining to me when you die of food poisoning!" She laughed, but the Doctor stared at her

"What?"

"What are you going to eat?"

"I don't know. Probably a soup and a sandwich"

He wandered off to the wardrobe, his bow tie drooping sadly. Amy went and made herself a large sandwich. Then she saw a large bottle of something at the back. It had lemonade written on it, so she poured the liquid into a few champagne glasses, and set the table out because she was bored. But as the Doctor was taking ages, she went into the control room, and as she'd plugged her ipod into charge, she decided to take a look at the songs on it.

The TARDIS had a stock of music, it seemed, and Amy had decided to test it by writing a list of what she wanted put on. It had worked. But there was one song she didn't recognise. So she put it on, and to her surprise it was quite good. It was a World Cup song, and called Waka Waka (This time for Africa) By Shakira. By the end of 3 listens, she had it on max volume and was dancing around in earnest. So she didn't hear the Doctor calling her. He came running into the control room, looking panicked

"AMY PO-" He stopped and looked at her in puzzlement.

"Um" Amy buried her head in acute embarrassment

"What's that song?" He asked, seemingly unaware of her embarrassment

"It's by Shakira" He looked delighted

"Oh really! I love shakira! Great singer. But she doesn't like fish custard either." He tapped her nose knowingly.

"How do you know that? Actually, never mind, I'm hungry, how about some lunch? 

Author's Note:  
Hi readers! Okay, next chapter up soon, but i'm a bit busy today, so it'll have to be worked on tonight. Remember, thanks for the reviews, keep em coming if u want one HELL of a gigantic cyber cookie! And if you don't, watch out for the evil bunnies!


	3. Chapter 3

After lunch Amy was feeling really quite dozy. She had no idea why, but the Doctor seemed to be puzzled. He was looking at his lemonade glass. After ten minutes Amy finally blew her top completely

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THAT GLASS OF LEMONADE FOR GOD'S SAKE?"

He jumped and looked at her

"Amy, I don't think that's lemonade"

"It most certainly is, it was in a bottle marked LEMONADE in big letters. SEE FOR YOURSELF!"

She grabbed the bottle out the fridge and swung it so near his nose he went cross-eyed

"Oh no"

"WHAT!"

"You didn't know Captain Jack Harkness, did you?"

"No!"

"This is all his fault, I'm going to KILL him!" The Doctor got up and started pacing round the room, rubbing the back of his head with his hand

"WHY?"

" ONLY BECAUSE HE'S GONE AND POURED 100% VODKA IN A BOTTLE LABELLED LEMONADE!"

".God"

"Exactly"

"You're saying to me that I've just drank 4 glasses of 100%vodka in half an hour."

"Yes. But on the good side...We're going to the World Cup!"

Amy went ballistic

"WHAT! I'VE JUST GOT EXTREMELY DRUNK AND YOU SAY THAT WE'RE-" But a slow, lazy smile crept across her face. The Doctor cursed mentally. It was psychic vodka, it was renowned on the planet Blahasuefo2tr. It messed with your head, great for a party but not good for a time machine. The Doctor fought with all his might not to succumb, but he'd downed about 5 glasses more than Amy. He smiled weakly and patted the TARDIS

"Sorry old thing" And to himself

"I'm going to have one HELL of a hangover tomorrow!"

Then he was taken by the inevitable power of the vodka

"AMMMMEY!"

A drunk Amy came skipping gaily in from the other room

"HULLO! IT'S PETER PAN! YIPPEE!" She shouted whilst chopping up carrots and chucking them at him.

"IT'S TINKER-BELL BUT UGLIER!" He cried whilst emptying the trash can over his head.

"GO PUT A BANANA IN YOUR EAR!" Amy was yelling as she danced around with 2 bananas in her ears and a pencil with a cauliflower stuck on it in her hair

"I CERTAINLEY WILL ELIZABETH!" He bellowed

They then ran into the swimming room. The Doctor staggered about wildly and then over balanced, toppling over into the pool with a loud splash. He was sitting on a rubber duckie, which had the misfortune to be in between his legs. Amy did a spectacular dive-bomb into the pool, and proceeded to turn all the taps on full blast (a la Harry Potter!) Sometime later, under-water piggy-backing was invented! Amy chucked a bar of soap at the Doctor, which missed and splatted on his bow tie. He took that as a mortal insult

"You fudgeridoo eating, fattie liquorice stick a like, doggie smelling, fish custard hater" He said gravely

Amy was incensed and speechless. She took the time to grab a water gun filled with bubble bath and hit him square between the eyes. It dripped off his nose. In that time, she took the opportunity to insult him

"You budgerigar hating, lipstick wearing, bow tie wearing, fish custard eater." She stated, slurring her words.

"I'LL GET YOU FOR THAT MISS FAT POND!"

"DON'T YOU DARE CALL ME FAT YOU TWEED BLOB!" Amy wobbled out the pool and ran into the wardrobe, from when she proceeded to get all of his bow ties and wring out her wet hair on them.

Then the Doctor grabbed her Christian Louboutin shoes and was about to pee on them until Amy throttled him. He turned purple. At that point Amy took the shoes and sprinted off to the control room. She hid the shoes and stepped inside the small cupboard nearby. The Doctor staggered in looking rather the worse for wear. Amy jumped out the cupboard and screamed at him. The Doctor screamed back louder than she had and fell over on the controls.

The TARDIS groaned very loudly and multicoloured lights started flashing. The TARDIS was crashing.

All because of a drunk Time Lord

Authors note: I had so much fun writing this chapter. Who knows, maybe Jack will come along to the Cup with them! Love u reviewers, same as usual, lollipop and cookie if u review. Remember the bunnies know where u live...!* gives evil laugh and disappears in a puff of pink smoke.*


	4. Chapter 4

The Doctor groaned loudly.

"I'm NEVER drinking that stuff again. EVER!" He didn't realise he was shouting until Amy, who was flat out on the floor on the other side of the console shot him a baleful look.

"This isn't good, is it" She said, looking very pale, her eyes wide.

"No. Extremely very not good." He replied. He felt awful.

"You just crashed the TARDIS, didn't you?" She groaned

"No, I just landed it a slightly out of control way which caused the brakes to lock."

"You crashed it then."

"Yes." He scrambled up and fell over again.

"Amy, can you give me a hand? I need to check where we are" Amy walked over and pulled him up. He looked in her eyes, they weren't focusing properly and she looked dizzy.

"Let me just check the console and then we'll see if the TARDIS has an antidote to psychic vodka stuck in the med cabinet anywhere." She nodded

He checked it.

"Good. We're just outside the airport. That means even though the TARDIS has crashed we can still get to Africa!"

"Oh good...how are we going to pay for tickets, they're pretty pricey!"

He waved his psychic paper at her.

"But I can't go with a hangover, I'll probably start throwing peanuts at the stewards" He got up and searched the med cabinet.

"Yes! We have!" He pulled it out and proffered it to her. She took a swig.

"AAAH, that's a lot better! Thanks!"She said gratefully. But she still felt HYPER!

"Oh no. Dammit!" The Doctor cried as she went bounding round the room pretending to be a evil bunny (COUGH COUGH: The same will happen to you if you don't review!)

"Remedy to sadness. Whoops!" He ran after Amy and poured the righ tbottle of liquid into her mouth. She stood there perfectly normally, and the Doctor made sure he drank some too. He wasn't a fan of pounding headaches and throwing up by the bucketload.

"So, weren't we going to the World Cup?" She said, looking excited.

"Yes, but of course you humans need a few hours to pack. Go on then!" He said

She raised her eyebrows.

"And you don't?"

"Nope, I just chuck everything in. A lot easier!" He looked triumphant.

"I'll give that a miss shall I" But she bounded off all the same. A few hours later she returned with 3 very large suitcases, a handbag and a rucksack. He looked startled. He had just a small suitcase in hand.

"We're going to Africa! He shouted, and they ran into the airport.


End file.
